Wednesday weigh in

Today is a good day and a frustrating day I lost 1.5lb which is very good however I am about 3oz off my half a stone!!! Its so frustrating it makes me think if only I didn't have that Christmas pudding I might be having a happy 1st half a stone off dance.

I accomplished last weeks goal I went swimming today and nobody ran screaming at the sight of me in a swimming costume although it was the worst day to go as the kids are off and there was splashing and screaming and hardly any room just to swim. I am going to keep my goal as swimming once a week and see how I get with that.

Had my second driving lesson and it is safe to say I was a 100% better than my last lesson and I think I am going to be able to drive without killing myself or anyone else.  

On the having a baby side I haven't had a cycle since last May so I am going to the Dr  to see if he can at least give me something to make me have a period. My PCOS symptoms are bringing me down a bit today I have really thick facial hair and it feels like it grows very fast I have tried everything my Dr has prescribed the cream, metformin and spiro to no avail. I suppose I will forever be the bearded lady!!  

Sunday weigh in and chat!!

Weighed myself this morning and I have stayed the same phew!! I am very surprised as I didn't point Friday from lunch time until this morning I haven't eaten particularly awful but, there was a Christmas pudding dessert last night while watching Men in Black 3.

This weekend has been particularly hard as I am getting the time of the month symptoms (craving crap food and bloating) which is weird cause I haven't come on or had any kind of regular cycle for about a year can you have the symptoms without the result?

Also this weekend is a bank holiday and I am better at eating healthy when I'm working and in the work routine though exercise wise its good because we are scrubbing the house and moving furniture and were going to go for a couple of walks today and tomorrow.

I am hoping to have lost a lb by my weigh in on Wednesday and my goal is to drink more water.

Wednesday I weighed in!!

Weigh in day yesterday and I lost another lb!! 

I am so surprised that I lost I made sure I was good for most of the week but Saturday we had Chinese takeaway and my birthday I didn't point anything. I didn't pig out completly but I had cheesecake, maltesers and a BBQ. If it was a good week it might have been a couple of lb. 

Exercise this week I was ment to go swimming with my gran on Wednesday but it didn't happen so me and my husband did some walking.

Also exciting news I had my first driving lesson it was pretty scary but I didn't crash into anyone so that's all good!! 

This weeks goal we have no social things this week so sticking to my point rigid and we have my dad's dog for a couple of days so we will be walking a bit and hopefully swimming next Wednesday!! 

Saturday weigh in confusion

Well I normally weigh myself Wednesday and Sunday but seeing tomorrow is my birthday I would weigh myself today. I weigh myself on our wii fit because our scales broke the day I decided to start weight watchers I guess it's not the most actuate but for now it will have to do however, it has now got me confused when I weighed myself on Wednesday I weighed myself with a full bladder (I had just woke up) and I had a hissy fit cause it had said I had put on the pound I had lost on the Sunday. After realising my mistake I weighed myself and it came out that I hadn't lost from the Sunday but had lost from the following Wednesday so I amended my weight on the app and all was fine the new weight was amended and all was fine. I weighed myself this morning and the wii fit said I have lost 2lb but the weight I have on my app is the same as after loosing the 2lb so have I really lost the 2lb or have I stayed the same I'm confused :s. 

In other news I start my driving lessons on Wednesday my husband booked it as a surprise I am so excited and nervous and at the same time eeeeee. 

Wednesday weigh in!!

Well today was weigh in day and I have lost weight!!! I have lost 0.6kg (1.3lbs) though they say that loosing anything is good but I was a little deflated as I wanted to lose my 1st half a stone though in hindsight 1.9kg (4.1lb) in just over 2 weeks isn't a complete disaster.

I have started my weight watchers diet slowly as I didn't want to give myself too much but my goal for the next week is exercise. I love to swim I always have so I am going to start swimming once a week however, I am not looking forward to the getting from the changing room to the pool I am having dreams about it I know I will be in the same boat as everyone else but am still dreading it. I am going to start with one and then up it to two when I can find another swimming costume. I have not been blessed in the body shape department I have a pear shaped frame narrow shoulders, smallish boobs and small short legs all my weight is on my hips, tummy and bum. So finding a swimming costume big enough in the tummy and without the under wiring is becoming a problem the place I got my one swimming costume didn’t have any in.

Other obstacles I am facing this week is that Sunday is my 28^th birthday and my family have organised a family BBQ so pointing is going to be a pain and resisting to eat a shed load of chocolate cake is going to be difficult might have to just blindfold myself. 

Rambling Introduction!!!

I have so many thoughts going through my head I don’t know what to write so I thought I would start with the basics. Also some housekeeping I am not the best speller and most of my posts will be rambling and a bit ranty (I don’t know if that is an actual word I like to make words up occasionally).

I am 27 and very nearly 28 and I have been married for 14 months and I want to have my own family.  I look at posts on Facebook and am insanely jealous of everyone who has children or pregnant!!

 We have been trying to conceive on and off for 3 years (took some time off to get into a wedding dress) and no such luck on the baby front.  The 18 months leading up the  wedding I lost about 2 and a half stone and fitted in my dream dress and felt like a princess however, 2 weeks on honeymoon and not really taking any thought into what I am eating I have put on the 2 and a half stone and plus some in a year.

 

I always knew I was going to have a struggle getting pregnant as I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was 16 and was partly the reason for trying for a baby earlier than if I hadn’t known.  I have always been heavy from the moment I hit puberty. I ballooned and from then my weight has gone up and down and now I am the heaviest I have ever been and I know this has now got to change.

 

My husband is incredibly supportive and will listen to my rants of not finding anything to wear and chucking all my clothes on the floor and having rants about how another person is having a baby I am starting to annoy myself so no idea how bored he is of it. (And breathe)  He has always wanted a family of his own and being the baby of a fairly big family has watched his siblings becoming parents and constantly gets asked “when will I get another niece or nephew?” and the “next time it will be you mate”.  I feel so bad not being able to give him the family he so desperately wants my crappy yoyo weight and rubbish reproductive system makes me so frustrated and I sometimes think about maybe he would be better off with a less baron wife?

I’m guessing most women would talk to their mothers about their problems but my mum isn’t at all supportive or maternal towards me or my sister.

So I think the reason I am writing this in a blog is that I need to get my thoughts out of my head and I don’t want to burden my friends  who have their own family’s and problems. I also don’t want to tell any of my family that I’m dieting because I can already hear the negative comments of “oh yeah ok another diet” or “we will see how this will turn out” or even worse the look and eye rolling.  I have tried loads of diets and the one that actually worked that I did pre-wedding was weight watchers so 2 weeks ago I signed up for the 3 months for £30 and its surprisingly working I have lost 5lbs already yay!!

 However, I’m feeling rubbish today as yet another friend has announced there pregnant and I can’t help but question why isn’t it our turn? What are we doing wrong? I wish I was one of those women whose husband only has to look at his wife and BAM 9 months later their parents (if only that happened right?)

 I know I am not the only woman who is going through this but sometimes we all need a moment of selfishness wishing it was now our time……